Friday, January 21, 2011

Why hello there, blog

I figure now is as good a time as any to introduce you to my staff accountants cats.

This is my tiny evil cat Beatrix.  She is small and gray and will Fuck You Up.


Beatrix likes cabinets, cereal bowls, and Fucking You Up.  She has a perpetual cold and a glitter collar and ears that are significantly too big for her head.  When she was even tinier, she chased my fully-grown cat Harvey under the bed and wouldn't let him out for three days.  I am quite certain that one day she will rule us all.

This is my large indifferent cat Harvey.  He is frequently mistaken for a rug.



Harvey speaks with a French accent and has been known to quote Sartre.  His favorite word is insouciant, followed closely by ennui.  He likes mid-century modern furniture and existentialist philosophy.  He is unlikely to Fuck You Up, but there is a good chance that he will stare at you disdainfully.



Thursday, December 23, 2010

file this in "things you didn't know you'd ever need to know"

Nepal is 5 hours 45 minutes ahead of GMT. 

So if it 3:59 pm in Kathmandu, it is Too Damn Early:14 in America.

Facts!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Thursday, December 2, 2010

What I SHOULD be doing:

- reading my work email
- writing that thing I can't talk about on the internet
- writing that other thing I can't talk about on the internet
- going for a run
- figuring out my mortgage


What I think I will ACTUALLY do:

- post a picture of the hello kitty snuggie we found in nebraska

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

words my phone has learned

I think my custom dictionary pretty much sums in up.
amarula
awww
bloomingdales
cameroon
costco
dca
dumbass
foursquare
fucked
fucking
heh
ikea
interwebs
ish
khartoum (really, blackberry?)
lqtm
maasai
meridien
mmk
mmmk
nats
ooh
oooh
ooooh
preggers
rasika
rotana
soonish
toumai
uber
ugandan
yay

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Those cookies were supposed to include everything BUT the kitchen sink.


Oops.  My office faucet has gone AWOL -- perhaps it was a terrorist faucet? -- but no matter, because in exchange we have received something far more marvelous: THE YOUTUBES.

I have no idea why it was finally unblocked, but it was, and now I can spend even more of my day on truly crucial matters, like tragic mistakes:

Beyonce videos:

And, of course, cat farts:

Thanks, corporate overlords!